Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
