Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Damn victory sex feels great
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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