I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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