sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Randomize