I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Randomize
