I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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