ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
