we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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