I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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