Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
