haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
