question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize