how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
