Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
