Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
