But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
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