when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
