Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
