the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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