Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
