are you still at the devil's house?
Your tits are I can't wait for
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
