Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
