and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
