I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
