just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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