I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
