I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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