I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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