this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
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