so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
It was like giving head to a cactus.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
