Please, let me fuck your mom
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
