he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Alive.
So much puke
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
