I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
