she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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