I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
