He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
