I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
how does that bad decision feel?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
