Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Farmville is her only friend.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Randomize
