she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
