I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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