i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
