i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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