Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
