so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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