If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
