found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
you will always have a special place in my vag
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
