Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
