I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize
