we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
