Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
