yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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